Do Children With ASD Grow by Being "Selfish"? Parenting Lessons From Sheep That Flip Over

🐑 Release it into the wild and... what? The surprising habit of the very fragile sheep

Out of the blue: in the world of shepherds, there's a rather shocking term, "cast sheep."

What does it mean? It's a sheep that has somehow rolled onto its back and can't get up on its own.

"Why not just get up?" you might think. But because of their fluffy wool, very round bodies and gas building up in the belly, once a sheep flips over it absolutely can't get up by itself. The more it struggles, the deeper the mud. Left alone, it can die within a few days. Surprisingly fragile...!

Wild goats or pigs, even if released into nature, would say "Yes, freedom!" and live tough lives.

But release a sheep into the wild with "There you go, you're free!" and it definitely won't survive. No fangs to fight enemies, slow to run away. It's a truly "delicate creature" that can't live without someone's care (watching over it).

In fact, since ancient times, sheep have often been compared to "people (especially children)" in the Bible and in literature.

"Left alone, they get lost" and "once they lose their balance, they can't recover on their own": maybe it's because this slightly clumsy weakness is just like us humans (lol).

🏃 A shepherd's pro skill: the job is "not just picking it up"

The ones who save these careless sheep are the shepherds, who keep a watchful eye every day.

When a shepherd spots "There's a cast sheep over there!" they rush over. But hauling it up with a "Hup!" is what amateurs do. A sheep that has been on its back for a long time has numb legs, a bloated belly, and is in a total panic.

So a professional shepherd first talks to it gently while rolling it onto its side to let the gas out of its belly. Then they gently massage its legs to get the blood flowing again.

Here comes the real skill. The shepherd doesn't force the sheep to stand. With a hand resting on it, they wait patiently for the moment the sheep plants its own feet and heaves itself up with a "Hup!"

At first its legs tingle and it staggers, but once it's standing firmly on its own feet, the sheep runs off happily into the meadow with a "Baaa! (Thanks!)"

🎮 A misunderstanding hidden behind "liberalism" and "free schools"

So, don't these "flipped-over sheep" and "shepherds" look a lot like parenting today?

The latest trend is "liberalism," with a lovely spirit of "Respect children's individuality!" and "Let them do what they love freely!" Meanwhile, more children are having trouble fitting in at school and stopping attending, and "free schools" are rapidly increasing as new places for them.

Having more options suited to each child's traits is a really good thing... BUT! There's a line we adults must not misunderstand.

That is: "respecting freedom" and "just leaving them alone (neglect)" are not even slightly the same!

Just like sheep that can't survive in the wild, human children have an endearing weakness: they can't survive if left alone. If adults look away, saying "they're free" or "it's their choice," children will one day flip over and become "cast sheep" somewhere in life.

🚨 Are you missing the signs your child is about to flip over?

Take a peek at your child's daily life. There are "signs of being about to flip over" scattered around that could become serious if left alone.

When they are rude to people

If you leave it uncorrected, thinking "their individuality is really shining," their future relationships will be wiped out...

When they eat only snacks instead of meals

If you let them eat all the snacks they want because "it's their freedom!", their health will definitely be in trouble!

When they're absorbed in games or social media late into the night

Leave it as "they're passionate about what they love!" and their daily rhythm collapses. The next morning, they can't get up at all.

For children with traits such as ASD (autism spectrum disorder), these can easily become states that are especially hard to escape on their own (the flipped-over cast-sheep state), because of strong fixations and hyperfocus

These aren't "freedom"; they are signs of weakness, an SOS from children who can't control things on their own. Noticing them and saying "Hey, hey!" to correct their course back onto the right path is the true "duty of a parent," isn't it?

🤝 Guide them with correction, then wait for them to "stand on their own feet"

Even if going to school or not is a free choice, kindness toward others and daily rhythms must not be left to "neglect." When they're about to flip over, you need to firmly correct them and pull them back.

But remember the shepherd's pro skill here.

Clearing away every obstacle in advance is the same as forcibly lifting the sheep. That way, the child's legs and back (their strength to live) won't develop.

* For a child who eats only snacks, teach the joy of meals and fix their eating habits

* With a child who can't stop gaming, make rules together and get their daily rhythm back

* For a child who can't go to school, stay close and look together for the next step, such as a free school (setting up a place for them)

After adults lend a little help this way, the final step is to trust and patiently wait for the child to realize "Oh, this won't do" or "I'll try my best here," and stand up firmly by their own will.

Rather than satisfying a child's desires by giving them what they want, stay close when your child has flipped over, and set up an environment where they can get up on their own.

🌸 Summary: Staggering, but growing stronger!

Children aren't supermen who can live perfectly from the start. Tempted by snacks, hooked on games, sometimes not wanting to go to school, they flip over again and again. They're human; like sheep, they're fragile, weak creatures when left alone.

At those times, brushing it off with "they're free" isn't love. But doing everything for them in advance is overprotective too.

What adults should do is firmly say no when something is wrong, and, heart pounding, sometimes scold and watch over them with "Come on, try standing on your own feet!"

A child who has stood up by their own strength, even while staggering, will surely have a much stronger look on their face than before.

Let's keep our eyes on our children today, and with a shepherd's warm gaze, cheer them on toward the moment they "stand up tall and become independent"!