The Heavy Reality of a Poor Parent-Child Relationship
For a child whose relationship with their parents is poor, and whose parents don't fulfill their responsibilities, growing up is never easy. When you're small, you may accept it as normal, but as the years go by, the thought "I'm unlucky to have parents like this" slowly seeps into your heart.
Warm Families That Seem Like Another World
When you visit a friend's home and see a warm family, or watch an ideal parent-child scene on TV, it can feel like a different world that has nothing to do with you. Each time, you may feel a hole opening up deep in your chest.
The Foundation of the Mind Where Negative Thinking Takes Root
These feelings cast a dark shadow on your emotional foundation. When we say negative thinking takes root easily, we mean that thoughts like "I'm nothing anyway" or "No matter how hard I try, it won't pay off" become a habit without your noticing. Because you lack the sense of security and self-esteem that parents are supposed to provide, you may fear failure and setbacks excessively, or be unable to simply enjoy even small successes. When you hear a friend smiling and saying, "I talked to my parents and they encouraged me," you may feel envy, and at the same time a rush of loneliness: "I don't have anyone like that to rely on."
An Impact That Doesn't Disappear in Adulthood
And even as an adult, the impact doesn't go away. Pressure at work, trouble in relationships, or standing at a crossroads in life: difficulties that most people could overcome feel strangely, overwhelmingly heavy.
The Invisible Chains of Trauma
Perhaps somewhere in your heart, a voice keeps echoing: "I'm no good" or "I don't deserve to be loved." A poor relationship with your parents can itself become trauma, an invisible chain that binds you even as an adult. If you have had this experience, I'm sure you know this feeling. You are not alone; that's what I want to tell you.
The Complexity and Frustration of Parenting
But parenting is not something you can easily sort out. Children do unexpected things, can be impulsive, dependent, and sometimes even violent. There are all kinds of situations, and for parents there are many moments when frustration builds up, aren't there?
What Is a Parent's Responsibility?
Even so, coping well with such a child, watching over them, and encouraging them when needed: quietly building that kind of good relationship is, I believe, a parent's responsibility.
What Stays in a Child's Heart
What stays in a child's heart may not be a perfect parent, but the memory that someone was really looking out for them.
Supervised by an occupational therapist
I've written other articles too. Please take a look if you like.
Ease Parenting Stress: 5 Ways to Make the Most of Today
Understanding the Causes of Postpartum Depression: Why Is It So Hard?
5 Basic Activities to Organize Your Busy Parenting Life
No Wonder You Feel Depressed! The Husband Who Won't Help With Housework